Donnerstag, Januar 04, 2007

Haarige Angelegenheit

In Fußball-Nürnberg ist es so ruhig zum Jahreswechsel wie schon lange nicht mehr (sieht man mal davon ab, dass der Captain's Curse wohl wieder zuschlagen wird), man bereitet sich in aller Gelassenheit auf das Hallenturnier vor (verliert da dann 1:7 gegen Fürth) , fliegt dann nach Spanien und testet bis zum Bundesligastart gegen einige Teams aus dem benachbarten Ausland. Keinerlei Aufgeregtheiten im Umfeld, keine möglichen Trainerentlassungen, Kopfschussdrohungen oder Lepra-Äußerungen, keine Panik-Neuverpflichtungen, nicht mal ein blamables Pokalaus (Auslosung des Viertelfinales ist übrigens am Sonntagnachmittag im ZDF, vorgenommen durch Oliver Bierhoff). So musste der Nürnberger Boulevard schon die Ehe-Krise des Nürnberger Managers zum Thema machen, um überhaupt, was zum Schreiben zu haben.

Damit ich mich nicht ähnlichen Dingen hingebe, die auch keine Schlagzeilen sind, wie die Tatsache, dass Theo Zwanziger die Zahl der Spieler pro Mannschaft im Amateurbereich verringern will, dass Raphael Schäfer und nicht Andi Wolf oder Joe Mnari von den FCN-Fans zum Spieler der Hinrunde gewählt wurde, oder dass der kicker extra erwähnen muss, warum Marek Mintal nicht in der Liste der besten offensiven Mittelfeldspieler der Hinrunde steht, zu dem großen Thema der Bundesliga des Jahres '07: Bärte. Gesichtsbehaarung. Rotzbremsen. Pornobalken.

Als bekennender Bartträger sehe ich es mit großer Sorge, dass kaum ein Spieler mehr sich offen zum Barttragen bekennt. Ja, der Bart in Deutschland hat harte Zeiten hinter sich, aber die Zeit der Stigmatisierung ist lang vorbei und es war auch nicht immer so. Bis in die frühen 90er Jahre war es noch so, dass die Spieler noch häufig mit Gesichtsbehaarung antraten und somit auch für eine erkennbare Eigennote standen. Heute finden sich in der Bundesliga kaum Spieler mehr, die einen Bart tragen (Kevin Kuranyis oder Ivica Banovics Bart kann man wohl kaum als solchen werten, da sie eher aussehen wie Ausrutscher mit dem Kajalstift).

Mit Lizarazu und Cantaluppi verließen am Ende der Saison wieder offene Verfechter des Barts die Liga. Ihre Zahl schrumpft scheinbar seit der Typ des aalglatten Profis gefragt ist immer mehr. Dabei zeigen doch die Herren Breitner, Batista und Gattuso doch, dass man mit Bart sogar höchste Weihen erreichen kann. Noch in der Saison 92/93 waren 82 Profis auf dem Mannschaftsbild als Bartträger eindeutig zu identifizieren (viele davon mit dem heute völlig aus der Mode gekommenen Polizistenbärtchen), heute dagegen sind es mit etwas Wohlwollen 12 Profis (Deisler, Owomoyela, K. Jensen, Barbarez, Samba, Neuendorf, Pienaar, Cacau, Gabriel, Böhme, Sarpei, Kioyo) plus einige häufiger unrasierte, wie Kyrgiakos oder Amanatidis. Das Bild eines bärtigen Spielers ist sogar so unbekannt geworden, dass Metzelders Play-Off-Bart zu einem "News-Item" wurde.

Überhaupt, der Play-Off-Bart, was für eine wunderbare Erfindung, eine ganze Website, auf der auch eine Chuck Norris-Trophäe für den besten NHL-Play-Off-Bart der Saison verliehen wird, ist ihm gewidmet. Man stelle sich vor, die gesamte Mannschaft von Werder Bremen würde sich bis zum Erringen des Meistertitels Bärte wachsen lassen, muss ja nicht gleich ein Rauschebart sein. Tim Wieses Gebrauchtwagenhändlerfrisur wäre plötzlich durch einen wunderbaren Schnauzer vervollständigt, Frings sähe aus wie ein Yeti und Klose und Borowski wären ihre Bubi-Gesichter los, Mertesacker nicht, bei ihm hätte sich bis Mai nur leichter Flaum gebildet. Leider nur ein Wunschtraum, der letzte, der das mit dem Meisterschaftsbart duchgezogen hat, war, soweit ich mich entsinnen kann, Oliver Kreuzer, lang ist's her.

Immer wieder wird das Thema aufgegriffen, sei es durch den genialen Javier Marias oder durch das Magazin RUND, aber es muss mehr passieren als nur punktuelle Aufmerksamkeit. Zur Rettung des Barts im Sport, beantrage ich analog zur vorgeschlagenen "Ausländerbeschränkung" eine "Babypopogesichtsbeschränkung", ob man hier nun eine 6+5 Regelung zur Rettung des Sportler-Barts anstrebt oder eine "local beard"-Regelung, wonach mindestens vier Spieler im Team sein müssen, die ihre Bärte schon seit den Jugendmannschaften tragen, muss sicher erst noch erarbeitet werden, aber es muss etwas passieren. Die Regelung würde nicht nur die Probleme des Image-Problems des Barts ("Rasier dich, dann bekommst du Arbeit!") angreifen, sondern auch die Chancen für interkulturellen Dialog durch eine höhere Anzahl islamischer Spieler in der Bundesliga erhöhen. Und vielleicht würde ja der ein oder andere gestandene Profi sich auch zu einem Bart durchringen können.

In diesem Sinne "Lasst den Rasierer mal liegen".
Euer
Flo

Mit herzlichem Dank an "the very own beardmaster" DeBruehe für die Fotomontagen, der auch Bartmuffeln Gesichtshaare verpassen kann.

Update von der Bartfront: Harter Schlag für die Bartfraktion: Bremens Owomoyela hat sich wie hier zu sehen ist, von seinem Bart (und seinen Haaren) getrennt und auch Sebastian Deisler ist kein Bundesligaprofi mehr.


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